jump to navigation

Guantanamera… August 1, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Dating, Dating in NYC, Dating Zen Masters, Love is War.
2 comments

The power of a woman… there ain’t nothing stronger….

Advertisements

Sex and the City: Samantha’s Relationship Test August 1, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Dating, Dating in NYC, Dating Zen Masters, Relationships.
add a comment

Dave Chapelle: The Love Contract July 30, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Dating, Dating in NYC, Dating Zen Masters, Just Damn Funny, Safe Sex, Sex, Strategery, The Case for Abstinence.
add a comment

Why…You…Never…Tell…The…Truth… July 26, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Dating, Dating in NYC, Just Damn Funny, Relationships, Safe Sex, Sex, The Case for Abstinence, The Love Equation.
add a comment

As a follow up to my post Why You Should Never Ask Them How Many People They’ve Slept With , here’s the forever famous scene in Clerks that makes the case all the better than I ever could.

Lol…enjoy.

Fugees: Could I Get a Date on Friday? July 19, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Dating, Dating in NYC, Dating Zen Masters, Strategery, The Love Equation.
add a comment

and if you’re busy, I wouldn’t mind to get Saturday…

Me & My Girlfriend July 18, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Dating in NYC, More Money More Problems, Relationships, Strategery, The Case Against Abstinence, You Tubes of Love.
add a comment

Those Damn Gold Diggers…. July 14, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Cheating, Dating, Dating in NYC, Dating Zen Masters, Love, Love is War, More Money More Problems, Music, Relationships, Strategery, The Case for Abstinence, The Love Equation, The Rebound.
add a comment

I’ve written about the overemphasis on money in relationships (Mo Money Mo Problems)…

I’ve brought you TLC’s No Scrubs

I’ve brought you Amy Winehouse’s Fuck Me Pumps

Now, you get a great piece from Biker Boys Blog on golddiggers… (some great comments in the original post as well).

Along with Kanye West’s Golddiggers to boot (listen close the lyrics my friends…listen close to the lyrics…he’s a master).

Both….are so tight.

Even better in the same post…

From Biker Blog….

I ain’t sayin she a gold digga

A lot of my lady friends these days seem to be looking for more serious relationships and the number one criteria on their minds is a guy who can provide “security”. But, at what point does it stop being looking for security, and start becoming plain ol’ fashioned gold diggin’? I can fully understand a girl wanting to marry a guy with ambition or a steady job. I mean, if you’re like one of my friends and plan on having 5 kids right away, then you’re not going to marry an aspiring hand model with no health insurance and a dollar to his name… at least that’s why she told me she couldn’t marry me (but with hands this beautiful who needs her).

However, it gets tricky when money is the sole factor in deciding someone’s eligibility, not taking into account ambition. There’s this girl I used to work with. Just so I don’t bias your view of her, we’ll refer to her as Gold Diggin Diana. Diana was in a steady relationship with her boyfriend since college for more than 6 years at the time, we’ll call him Nice Guy Nelson. Nelson was a stand up guy who loved her and was a great boyfriend in my opinion. He studied film in college and wanted to eventually become a director. But, if you are familiar with the film industry, you know that you can’t just come out of school and be a director. You have to pay your dues first and work your way up there. So like any other aspiring director, he was starting out as some peon for a director of a few shows at FOX. Well Diana suddenly decided that he wouldn’t be able to give her the financial security that she needed and dumped him to go after a 5 year older banker type who was clearly well off. As fate would have it, the banker completely played her and kicked her to the curb. She went back to Nelson, who being the nice guy that he was, took her back without hesitation.

If I was Nelson, I would not have taken her back. Here I am being a supportive boyfriend for over 6 years to this girl, but when I’m struggling and need support, on the grind trying to start my career, she up and leaves me for Bobby the Banker. I mean, I ain’t saying she a gold digga’. But wait, I already did call her Gold Diggin Diana. The moral of the story is this: Ladies, if your man has ambition and a dream, support him even though things may get rough. Other guys may have the money right now, but all that glitters isn’t gold, and good people are hard to find these days. Can I get an amen? (link)

Seinfeld: The Sexiest Breakup Ever! July 13, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Dating, Dating in NYC, Dating Zen Masters, Just Damn Funny, Relationships, Strategery, The Breakup, The Love Equation.
add a comment

Turn Off Your Damn Cell Phones! July 8, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Cheating, Dating in NYC, Just Damn Funny, Love is War, Safe Sex, Sex, Strategery, The Case for Abstinence, You Tubes of Love.
add a comment

Why You Should Never Ask Them How Many People They’ve Slept With July 5, 2007

Posted by The Love Doctor in Dating, Dating in NYC, If You Had No Interest in Sex, Sex, Strategery, The Case Against Abstinence, The Case for Abstinence.
4 comments

It’s a classic dilemma you meet somebody you want to connect with. In fact, you’ve never gotten along with somebody so well before. You tell them everything: your greatest stories, your strengths, your weaknesses, your fears, your hopes, your quirks, your best experiences, your worst experience.

Inevitably the question of the “number” comes up with.

“So…how many people have you slept with?”

This moment in time is critical. It could spell the end of your relationship, for no other reason than you didn’t read and hear this advice.

The Love Doctor’s advice is never EVER discuss your number of sexual partners.

Now, many people will disagree with me on this, or say that the discussion is inevitable… but I ask you…what good can actually come from having this discussion?

If the girl has a large number, or heaven forbid a bigger number than the guy, the guy’s oftentimes going to be freaked out. Look I’m not saying it’s fair or justified, but the reality is we live in a sexist society that emphasizes (consciously or unconsciously) female chastity. I can’t tell you how many stories there are of a guy who hears a number that’s higher than his and he can’t get all the girl’s previous partners out of his head (think for example of the 21 guy in Clerks).

If the guy has a huge number, it can spell the end of his image in the girl’s mind as a nice guy who’s not a player type. Whereas the girl was not jealous of other women before, it can get her head whizzing into now thinking about these girls: who were they, did you love them, have I met them, are they still you friends etc. etc. etc. Admittedly, women are better able to deal (and often actually expect it of guys in an undeniably sexist male-dominated society) with their guy having a large number, but it can still create unnecessary difficulties.

That’s why before you next answer, or ask this question yourself, ask yourself three questions:

1) Why do you want know?
2) What does it matter?
3) What good will come of knowing?

Of course, if you’re a virgin or not very experienced, you kind of have to bring these issues up. First of all, an experienced person will realize you’re not experienced anyways. When one person is new it’s a legitimate issue that needs to be talked about through communication. However, if it’s pretty clear both people are at least relatively experienced, there’s not much good that can really come of this conversation about “the number.”

It’s hard to do. You want to share everything. But this is just something that can’t help your relationship.

Moreover, what people often forget is if you do ask this question or answer it, how do you know they will answer honestly?

Unless you’re clairvoyant, you’ll never really know if their answer is completely true or not. Moreover, the higher the number, the less likely they are to give the absolute truth.

Given all that, the Love Doctor suggests, privacy first. Just tell them you don’t need to know.

Here, unlike in the context of our discriminatory military policy, don’t ask don’t tell makes sense!

– The Love Doctor